Showing posts with label silly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label silly. Show all posts

Parody Re-Mix of the TTC Union’s $1 Million Ad

The TTC workers’ union launched a million-dollar ad campaign recently, bemoaning the recent trend of budget freezes and privatization.

As part of their Protecting What Matters campaign, they’ve released an extremely slick commercial that has everyone chattering about its superb production values.

When I saw it, I knew right away that it deserved a re-imagination as a horror movie trailer. It’s just too over the top and serious to resist. A few slight adjustments -- and voilà! I give you Saw: Protecting What Matters.


[LINK]

If you haven’t seen the original TTC workers’ union ad, here it is for comparison:


[LINK]

Sources

Clips have been sourced as follows:
Video clips: Protecting What Matters, SAW trailer
Audio: SAW trailer

Disclaimers and disclosure for CYA

This is a parody. It’s meant as a humorous, fair-dealing critique of the original ad, to which I’ve linked and for which I have mentioned the creators. This specific video, while containing clips produced by the TTC worker’s union, does not purport to represent the union or its members in any way. Nor is it representative of LionsGate Films or Air Castle Films. I am not affiliated with the Amalgamated Transit Union Local 113. I am however a regular TTC user. Actors shown are depicted in a fictional sense and accompanying audio should not be taken as having anything to do with the actual people. 
In summary, please have a sense of humour.
With respect to contracting out, I will reserve comment within this particular post. I have faith that the TTC Board, with input from city council -- and from the TTC worker’s union as well as users of the system -- will find an acceptable solution to the matter at hand...


See Also


This is so wrong I don't know what to say

Umm, WHAT?!
Look at this monstrosity

At least it made me laugh.

The kicker is, it’s for sale. I feel like buying it just so I can punch the guy in the face. And he had the gall to use a deck from a local board maker (Bombora)!

Source: craigslist (likely to expire soon Expired)

What Happens When You Cross Party Rock Anthem With Who Let The Dogs Out

Perhaps it’s just me, but the exuberant Korean viral sensation Gangnam Style by PSY sounds familiar. It’s kinda overplayed now, but I nevertheless really enjoy the video’s satirical, over-the-top insouciance.



I was wondering whether anyone else hears the same auditory likeness that I do? Listen to the catchy buildup and release to the main hook from Gangnam style -- and by ‘hook’ I mean “that chunk of the song that everybody knows and that everybody sings along with, and if you’re on the dance floor you go crazy to it”:

Oppa Gangnam Style - Main hook (~2:23 in; listen for about 20 seconds, then come back)

Compare that with the buildup and hook from LFMAO:

Party Rock Anthem - Every Day I’m Shufflin’ hook (~3:30 in)

And then throw in the syncopated ‘woof!’ chant of Who Let the Dogs Out?... Can you deny the rhythmic similitude to:

“Op, op, op, op... Oppa Gangnam Style”?

I’m not suggesting that they’re the same, or that PSY is in any way derivative. But I think it’s interesting to notice the commonality between these three pop culture hits. What is it about that particular structure of off-beats and pauses that makes it so instantly appealing?

I’d love to hear from anyone who has studied music theory on this.

Update
Turns out I’m not the only one who thinks there is a structural similarity to Party Rock. Check out this mashup:


Some background info here.

Pizza Pizza’s ‘Canadian Pie’

Every week, Pizza Pizza sends me a junk-mail flyer, advertising their specials. I usually ignore them, but their latest flyer caught my attention -- unfortunately, probably not in the way they intended...

Take a look at this panel from the flyer:

Pizza Pizza’s 'Canadian Pie' -- umm...

Movie poster for American Pie
(For those of you with high-brow tastes who don’t recognize the referent film, it’s American Pie.)

I know this sophomoric flick dates from the last century, but has anyone at the Pizza Pizza marketing department actually seen this movie?

Don’t they remember what happens to the pie? 

I suspect there has been a failure here to fully consider the connotations invoked by this particular pop-cultural reference.

What exactly are they trying to tell us about their pizza?

Incidentally, for those of you who were fans of the original flick, the ‘ten-year’ American Reunion movie (starring the same cast) is due to be released shortly...

[If anyone has somehow escaped hearing about the plot of the film and still don’t understand what the joke is (e.g. some of my international readers), may I cordially advise you that looking it up online (or watching the movie) may cause you to entertain second thoughts about ordering this item.]


See Also...
Why I Love Waffle House -- A Personal Reflection

Wait a second, that’s ME!!

I recently noticed to my amusement that the climber in the background image for this season’s Tour de Bloc website is me. It’s great that they chose a photo of a normal recreational climber (rather than one of the many serious competitors out there)...

Hey that’s me! (right forefront - click to expand)
Photo: possibly Dennis Barnes (not 100% sure--e-mail me if you know!)

The photo is -- I believe -- from the 2009/2010 series -- the first comp at the then-newly-opened True North Climbing Gym in North York, Ontario. Apparently I had a good time!

That’s my friend Mike Palma in green, scrutinizing a sequence.

In the picture I’m (presumably) about to finish an intermediate route. I also remember another problem from this comp -- seen on the left slab wall. The climber in black with splayed legs is working it -- a low numbered but surprisingly challenging problem where you stood on these big yellow blocks and traversed across the slab.

Alas, content obscures me on most of the pages on the site -- but who cares. I’m ‘internet-climbing-famous’! w00t!

Prospective sponsors, take note...


See Also...

Occupy North Pole!

Santa Claus is the 1%. 
Santa: a corpulent image of corporate excess
Illus.: Thomas Nast, 1881
He only works a single day each year.

Yet he merrily exploits an unpaid labour force of bedraggled elves, who toil away frantically inside a mass-production factory, euphemistically known as ‘Santa’s workshop’ -- or is that Santa’s sweatshop?

(Do the elves have a labour contract? Or are they essentially slaves? An impartial third-party audit of the elves’ working conditions has never been released to the public.)

Just look at him: plump, jolly Santa is the very image of excess. In The Night Before Christmas, he’s described as being dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot’. And who is the gluttonous recipient of the milk and cookies, year after year?

Santa’s List: Orwellian tool for
oppressive social conditioning?
Santa -- one man, alone! -- wields the monopoly power to decide whether you’ve been naughty or nice. By what means did he acquire his capricious and judgemental authority? We never held any democratic elections for this.

Doesn’t that strike you as an unseemly and inequitable concentration of influence for a single person?  

Where is the transparency and accountability in his decision-making process? If your name shows up in the wrong spot on that arbitrary, notorious List of his, you wind up with a lump of coal instead of a present! Sure, he claims to check it twice -- that’s supposed to be quality control? What are the safeguards to prevent systemic fraud or other abuses?

And, most importantly with respect to the Occupy framework, why does Santa consistently give rich kids more expensive gifts than to poor kids? Social justice is being failed.

“He knows when you’ve been good or bad” -- since when did we grant Santa unfettered access into our homes, to conduct Panopticon surveillance for every moment of our personal lives? It’s a gross invasion of our privacy rights -- the first step towards a totalitarian dictatorship.

Notice how, during the busiest travelling time of the year, Santa flies with impunity across national borders -- without any checkpoints, customs inspections, or security monitoring whatsoever. No lines or waiting for the privileged old elf! Of course, he also lives in magnificent isolation at the North Pole -- free from taxation, and sheltered from the prying eyes of the masses.

Santa: shilling for conspicuous consumption
Despite all this, the federal government insists on providing Santa with an ongoing, heavy subsidy -- mail addressed to Santa is typically answered on his behalf by legions of ‘volunteer’ postal workers.

He doesn’t need to lift a finger, and the feds are there to bail him out from all those tricky questions kids can ask.

In return, few figures serve commercial interests as eagerly as Santa Claus. For example, Haddon Sundblom famously portrayed Santa as a dedicated Coca-Cola quaffer for several decades (A persistent meme continues to circulate that Santa’s red and white uniform is a deliberate invocation of the Coca-Cola corporate colours. Coincidence? Perhaps...).

To conclude, we need to re-examine our blind acceptance of the man in red.


Under the deceptive guise of patronizing beneficence and ritualized good-cheer, Mr. Kringle has insinuated himself into a position of deeply secular symbolism, antithetical to the roots of Christmas.

His materialist emphasis on gifts serves only to whitewash greed as a value, and to drive shopping behaviour during the holiday season. When children make their annual pilgrimage of obeisance -- while he sits regally on his throne at the mall -- what’s the key question he asks of them? “What do you want for Christmas?”

That is how the cultural indoctrination of lifelong consumerism begins.

I invite one and all to join with me in protest -- and together let’s #OccupyNorthPole!

Santarchy 2005, Toronto: The movement for change begins
(yours truly w/ grey beard)
Take Action Now Against Santa’s Moral Fascism
Photo: New York Daily News
We are the 99% -- not Santa
Photo: Steve Rhodes


Attempts to contact Santa for comment have not yet met with a response.

--
Support resources for this post provided by: United Snowmen Against Climate Change.

Steve Jobs New Yorker Cover, Captioned by the Internet

Garish humour, a little too soon -- but some internet memes cannot be denied, and this one was practically obligatory.



Poignant -- because it’s true.

For those who don’t get the reference, or are otherwise unamused -- see here. And here. Thanks Charles Lavoie!

p.s. Yes I know Jobs was a Buddhist.

Why Does Klout Think I’m Influential About Broccoli?

image: broccoli
Do you love broccoli? I guess I do.
According to Klout -- a new website that purportedly measures a person’s online influence, via social networks such as Twitter and Facebook -- I am influential about broccoli.

Yes -- broccoli, that green, flower-headed vegetable we all know and love.

I had been tweeting back and forth with my awesome friend Lee Anne about her own bemused discovery of being influential on the subject. Associating with her appears to have rubbed off on me: now, I too have been deemed a broccoli influencer!

Yours truly, Broccoli Person of Influence - per Klout

Researcher dana boyd writes in Guilt Through Algorithmic Association how Google’s autocomplete sometimes affiliates innocent people with unrelated events or concepts.

This feels like a similar scenario.

image: Romanesco broccoli
Romanesco broccoli often
exhibits fractal properties

Because truthfully, I don’t know much about broccoli. And neither does my friend -- at least not more than any normal person.

Yet that’s what the algorithm declares, merely because we’ve happened to mention broccoli a few times in online conversation.

Based on these early results, the Klout mechanism for evaluating a person’s topical influence is obviously still in its developmental infancy -- I’m sure improvements are rapidly on the way.

The determinative algorithm isn't published anywhere, but it gives the impression of being heavily weighted towards simple keyword recurrence, for the moment.


Embracing the Mantle of Broccoli Authority
In her post, boyd asks the questions:
  1. What are the consequences of guilt through algorithmic association?
  2. What are the correction mechanisms?
  3. Who is accountable?
  4. What can or should be done?
Like boyd, I’m not sure I know what the answers are.

There shouldn’t be any serious negative effects from having my online identity humorously associated with a vegetable. But who knows -- what if my boss hates broccoli? What if broccoli falls out of culinary fashion, and develops a gastronomic stigma? Could this adversely impact my career?

In Treehouse of Horror XI
Homer Simpson is killed
by eating broccoli
With respect to correction mechanisms, I’m an optimist -- or a pessimist, depending on your attitude towards intelligent systems and their societal influence -- so I’m confident competition will drive improved results over time. The algorithms are bound to get better.

Information services must nevertheless take responsibility for when their results prove erroneous (Klout, for the record, does allow users to manually remove topics that don’t make sense).

With respect to the last question, what can be done -- the most amusing course of action seems clear: Let’s reinforce the results with positive feedback, and deliberately cement my burgeoning reputation for online broccoli thought-leadership.

And that’s why I’ve larded up this entry with tangential broccoli references, facts and information (If you sign up for a Klout account, please +K me on the subject! Peer votes affect the results).

Want to know about broccoli? I’m your guy, and this is the canonical post you want to read. 

Well, maybe not...





Additional broccoli facts compiled for no purpose other than to extend the author’s apparent but slightly misleading credibility with respect to Brassica oleracea
If you’re an actual broccoli expert, and are miffed by my transient appearance on the scene -- I’m sorry. I’m sure my era of broccolic tyranny will prove fleeting, once Klout improves their topic appraisal methodology (or reads this post).

In the meantime, here’s What You Might Not Know About You Know What...

Albert Broccoli was the producer (along with Harry Saltzman) of the James Bond films, overseeing their progression from low budget affairs to today’s lavish spectacles.

Dana Carvey’s SNL audition piece was called ‘Chopping Broccoli’:



Broccoli comes from the Italian plural of broccolo, “flowering top of a cabbage.” A part of the cabbage family, it was first introduced to the United States by Italian immigrants, but was not popular in North America until the 1920s. China, India, and the U.S. are the primary exporters, accounting for nearly three-quarters of world broccoli production. It is a cool-weather crop that fares poorly during hot summer weather.

Broccoli and Melted Cheddar = AWESOME

Yummm....
Broccoli is rich in vitamin C -- a cup of broccoli has more of it than an orange -- dietary fibre, calcium, folic acid, lutein and other carotenoids, and it also contains nutrients with reputed anti-cancer properties.

Don’t boil it -- this destroys many of the nutrients!

Lastly, I once tried to convince a close friend of mine to name her first child ‘Broccoli’. My helpful suggestion was ignored in favour of the more prosaic Rosaline.

Image: broccoli treehouse
Broccoli House by Brock Davis


Garbage In, Garbage Out
The other topics that Klout alleges I’m influential about are also instructive: oasis and gym. I have no expertise in either of these terms (at least what most people would think of when they read those words). I did however, once muse about the destruction of a climbing gym called Rock Oasis.

The semantic abstraction hasn’t been made -- the claimed scope of influence is far broader than the reality. You might claim I’m mildly knowledgeable about ‘a climbing gym named Rock Oasis’ -- but the algorithm isn’t sophisticated enough to understand this. One day, though, it will be! That’s an exciting -- and scary -- prospect.

So to those readers who came across this blog looking for information about Oasis (the rock band) -- or broccoli recipes -- my sardonic apologies. Don’t blame me, it’s the algorithm that brought you here.



Algorithmically-driven services have notably gone awry many times. In the 2002 Wall Street Journal article If TiVo Thinks You Are Gay, Jeffrey Zaslow reported at length on how personalization technologies can output false associations or recommendations, based on misinterpreted data or input (full text of that article here).

Other examples of the perils of algorithmic association:
  • The recommendation engines for Amazon and Netflix have grappled over their entire existence with the challenge of improving relevancy for suggested transactions based on past purchases
  • Google-bombing is an example of people deliberately feeding in misleading information to drive artificial results from an algorithm, for comedic or satirical effect (e.g. ‘George Bush’ being linked to the search term ‘miserable failure’)
  • LinkedIn and Facebook use social ads -- based on profile information -- to imply associations and to drive revenue from advertisements based on those links.

image: steamed broccoli
Steamed broccoli is an excellent
source of retained nutrition
CC Photo: Quadell
We live in a world where massively large data sets of digitised profile, transaction, behaviour, and historical information are being compiled.

These data sets are being coupled with increasingly complex, sophisticated, automated systems that attempt to predict or recommend future actions or preferences. The results of this combination can have an unintended impact on our online identity.

Judging by my alleged influence about broccoli -- apparently we still have a lot of progress to make.

What about you?
Are you influential about a random topic? Share your story in the comments and describe how you think it occurred.


Related reading:
Eli Pariser’s Filter Bubble Problem
How to Opt-out from LinkedIn Social Ads
Broccoli recipes (allrecipes.com)
What your Klout Score Really Means (Wired)

Thank you for selecting the Air Shipment option...

I bought a memory card online for my camera. Amusingly, it was delivered in a hugely voluminous box relative to the card. I guess Air Shipping means shipping air...

If I'd bought a larger memory card, would that mean an even bigger box?
(Card packaging removed for emphasis)


Monstrous, spectacular stop motion animation

The sheer amount of effort required for this stop motion animation short is mind boggling. You have to watch this. I'm not kidding.

BIG BANG BIG BOOM - the new wall-painted animation by BLU from blu on Vimeo.


Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: Hey that's me!

Amusingly, I recently discovered that I have been making an (extremely peripheral) appearance in a chain e-mail that's circulating around the Internet.

We've all received these e-mails at one point or another. People send them around, they get forwarded a million times, eventually a friend of a friend sends it to your friend who thinks it's funny, and they pass it along to you... Typically they're slightly spammy collections of jokes, funny pictures, and so on, the static precursors to viral YouTube videos. Everybody has an uncle or cousin or acquaintance who loves these messages. The mechanics of how they propagate would make fine grist for a Malcolm Gladwell article.

Yesterday my dad forwarded me this deck of pictures (posted here as a google doc). [Yes, I know by posting the link I am myself transmitting this viral time-waster. Guilty as charged -- that's how these things work!]

"I am sending you this slide presentation... you are in one of the photos", he wrote.

Naturally I was skeptical. I opened it up and it was a typical set of captioned photos, primarily of silly or bizarre situations. You have to be in a certain mood to appreciate them. I took a quick glance through the deck...

Sure enough, there I am, about halfway in.* My incredulity was mistaken.

It's merely a peripheral shot where I'm in the background, and it's buried in a larger grouping of images, so it's not like I'm central or anything, but it's still weird to realize this image is out there, circulating endlessly over the internet, a tiny meme reproducing in people's e-mails and providing a sliver of a laugh each time. This fractionated, diffused 'fame' feels rather hollow.

At least it gave my dad a good chuckle!

So -- the next time you get one of those e-mails or see a post that reads, "Hey check this out", you never know -- you might be a part of it without knowing!

* It's the slide titled 'Stones Stacker', slide 23, if you're curious. It's indisputably me lurking in the back of the shot, partially cut off, wearing a Tilley Hat, oversize RayBans, and a maroon climbing shirt. I'm gawking at what you're supposed to be looking at - a guy balancing rocks. The shot was taken a few years back, during a Yonge Street Festival closure (before David Miller cancelled them). Always a bystander.

Ohio declares selling crack is a job; no benefits!

Apparently in Ohio crack dealing is considered 'sustained remunerative employment' and consequently is sufficient cause to terminate total disability compensation.

Those stingy Ohioans!